After successfully exposing corruption at the Olympics and now FIFA, top investigative journalist, and pork pie lover, Andrew Jennings has exposed the systemic corruption that lead to the ‘The Internet’ taking out a 5 year restraining order against Destroya. This ironically is the first post for exactly two years!
Jennings discovered that the Judge who granted the highly controversial and unprecedented ban, Lord Justice Winklethorpe-Smyth III, is in fact related to Nikki Sixx the Bass Player from glam tart rock band Mötley Crüe, who have held a long term fatwah against Destroya because of their rivals massive success and the fact that Pamela Anderson used to cry out for Soakie Vest every time she and the ‘Motley’s’ Tommy Lee used to do the double back monster. That and Soakie is by far and away the better drummer.
With the decision over turned, Destroya can once again pollute the world wide web with its usual brand of factual discourse and utter filth. Indeed many blamed the low attendance* on the recent 3 show German tour down to the lack of digital info from the band.
Ruth, Head of Everything at Destroya PLC/Corporation, commented ‘Those tussled haired posers have had their comeuppance good and proper. This was a clear attempt to interrupt and damage my bands wellbeing and of course limit the huge amount of filthy lucre that was rolling into the Destroya bank account. This in turn meant we had to cancel charitable donations that would have save dozens of kittens, puppies and other cute animals. I hope they can live with themselves’. Ruth also confirmed that in the coming days there will be a further post on the ‘boys’ first venture into publishing.
In a new development it seems that Mötley Crüe have been slain in there L.A. lair with no reported survivors. Police are looking for Kirsten Dunst.
*The low attendance is a reference to Soakie and Domefur not turning up and not the attendance at the gigs which totalled 183,398 over the three concerts.
